Make Way for the Crazy Train! Whoo Whoo!
As an official spokesman for the Books A Million Company, I must say that last night proved to be the most exhausting, craziest, most emotionally daunting night on record. Why? Because there were CRAZY people in the store. CRAZY I tell you! CRAZY! Allow me to explain.
Using a handy list format, allow me to illustrate the kind of people who were in the store last night, in order of craziness:
1. Sketch guy using a stolen credit card to buy $300 worth of hardback bestsellers, leaving when said card was declined and hopping on small bicycle
2. Lady in purple jogging suit looking for a "big" birthday card for her dog
3. Small group of 12-year-old blondes drinking espresso drinks that their parents think are decaf which, in fact, are not
4. Crazy cell phone woman talking loudly into a phone that has a classical music ringer that not only rings every 5 to 6 seconds, but is roughly two decibals louder than a jet engine
5. Four crazy Books-A-Million associates, labeled the Hot-Girl Crew by some, thinking how cool it would be if we had CB radios (Breaker, breaker 1-9, this is Coffee Cup, I'm gonna need the Mutant up in the cafe for a little foaming action. Do you read?)
And yes, this was my night. It was crowded, it was loud, and I had the giggles. I came home covered in chocolate because of chocolate pump explosion and looking as if I lactate coffee because of clumsy spillage. And I was exhausted. I have to say I had the best non-sex related sleep I've ever had last night, so good in fact, that it was better than some of the sex that I've had. It was almost worth having the crazy night just to get the sleep. And now I'm off, ready for a day of action. I am actually going to Newport News tonight to do a bit of shopping and go out to eat. I am cool. And it looks like I'm going to have some money coming my way because of some long lost savings bonds my parents just found and are going to cash in. God bless 'em! So I am actually really cool right now, so cool you don't even know. Feel jealous reader. Feel very jealous.
Well, I should go. I am going to finish Olivia Joules before I go out, which should be fun and entertaining. Then I'm going to get ready. It will be good. Oh so good. Like sleep. And stolen credit cards. And foaming action (he he).
Using a handy list format, allow me to illustrate the kind of people who were in the store last night, in order of craziness:
1. Sketch guy using a stolen credit card to buy $300 worth of hardback bestsellers, leaving when said card was declined and hopping on small bicycle
2. Lady in purple jogging suit looking for a "big" birthday card for her dog
3. Small group of 12-year-old blondes drinking espresso drinks that their parents think are decaf which, in fact, are not
4. Crazy cell phone woman talking loudly into a phone that has a classical music ringer that not only rings every 5 to 6 seconds, but is roughly two decibals louder than a jet engine
5. Four crazy Books-A-Million associates, labeled the Hot-Girl Crew by some, thinking how cool it would be if we had CB radios (Breaker, breaker 1-9, this is Coffee Cup, I'm gonna need the Mutant up in the cafe for a little foaming action. Do you read?)
And yes, this was my night. It was crowded, it was loud, and I had the giggles. I came home covered in chocolate because of chocolate pump explosion and looking as if I lactate coffee because of clumsy spillage. And I was exhausted. I have to say I had the best non-sex related sleep I've ever had last night, so good in fact, that it was better than some of the sex that I've had. It was almost worth having the crazy night just to get the sleep. And now I'm off, ready for a day of action. I am actually going to Newport News tonight to do a bit of shopping and go out to eat. I am cool. And it looks like I'm going to have some money coming my way because of some long lost savings bonds my parents just found and are going to cash in. God bless 'em! So I am actually really cool right now, so cool you don't even know. Feel jealous reader. Feel very jealous.
Well, I should go. I am going to finish Olivia Joules before I go out, which should be fun and entertaining. Then I'm going to get ready. It will be good. Oh so good. Like sleep. And stolen credit cards. And foaming action (he he).
posted by Southern Belle at 11:04 AM
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