I'm Baaaack!
When I say "I'm baaack," I mean it in many, many ways. But today in the interests of time and space and whatever, I am going to keep my welcome back post (first one in a month!!!) to a few handy-dandy lists.
What I Have Learned in the Past Month
1. You can only do so much.
2. Laziness is not a vice. It can be very rewarding.
3. Leo Tolstoy so rocked. Hands off, Oprah.
4. A life lived in a strange, sleepy haze is no life at all.
5. If you do just a few things and do them really, really well, no one can complain.
6. The town of Madison, Wisconsin is smaller than Richmond, VA.
7. You should take people's advice. Especially when they live with you and know you quite well.
8. You gotta do what you gotta do.
9. Corporations are never good. Here's a shocker: They have their own interests in mind!!!
10. Epicureanism is a good philosophical path, if one needs a philosophical path.
Things that I Have Embraced About Myself
1. I tend to forget to pay bills on time, even when I have the money.
2. I need sleep.
3. I need to drink Coke, despite the nutritional information to the contrary.
4. I need to talk to my mother at least once a day.
5. I'm a writer, and that's it. I'm not meant to work for the Man, or work in the service of others.
6. I'm at my best when I am as far removed from the general public as possible.
7. I like Bon Jovi, and that will never change.
8. I enjoy low forms of culture (VH1, The Golden Girls, cop shows) but if you want to talk about postmodern literature, sit down, bitch, I got something to say (i.e. I can do that too).
9. I tend to fall down steps.
10. I like to lay in bed and smile at whomever is laying there beside of me.
11. I like cotton underwear, even if I am going to get lucky that day. It's just more comfortable.
Things I Need to Improve About Myself
1. I guess I should pay the bills on time.
2. I need to start folding my laundry instead of just leaving it in a Leaning Tower of Pisa-esque structure in my room.
3. I need to stop taking my boyfriend for granted.
4. I need to write more.
5. I need to slow down and chill out and enjoy things rather than rush from here to there in some sort of attempt to be able to buy clothes and lipstick.
(Of course you knew this list would be shorter than the others. I am a Southern Literary Queen after all.)
And finally...Things that Piss Me Off
1. The word "muggy."
2. Bad writing that is supposed to be good writing. I mean bad writing for bad writing's sake is great, but when it is supposed to be an attempt at literature, come on!
3. Those "W" stickers that everyone has on the back of their SUV's that are printed with the American flag. How frigging retarded are you people?
4. Oprah, Dr. Phil, and other self-help aficionados.
5. William and Mary Parking Services.
6. The head D.A. on Law and Order. He gives the South a bad name.
7. People dissing John Kerry's military record. I mean, come on, the guy looks like Lurch, and WHEN he gets elected, he is going to inherit a whole heap of bad shit. He's got enough problems.
8. Consumerist mentality.
9. Pretentious people (although I know sometimes that I am pseudo-pretentious--It's like those homophobes who are secretly gay. Jerry Falwell for example--oh shit, I just compared myself to Jerry Falwell. Shoot me now.)
10. The fact that weekends are only two days, and that there are no compulsory "reading days" in the "real world."
What I Have Learned in the Past Month
1. You can only do so much.
2. Laziness is not a vice. It can be very rewarding.
3. Leo Tolstoy so rocked. Hands off, Oprah.
4. A life lived in a strange, sleepy haze is no life at all.
5. If you do just a few things and do them really, really well, no one can complain.
6. The town of Madison, Wisconsin is smaller than Richmond, VA.
7. You should take people's advice. Especially when they live with you and know you quite well.
8. You gotta do what you gotta do.
9. Corporations are never good. Here's a shocker: They have their own interests in mind!!!
10. Epicureanism is a good philosophical path, if one needs a philosophical path.
Things that I Have Embraced About Myself
1. I tend to forget to pay bills on time, even when I have the money.
2. I need sleep.
3. I need to drink Coke, despite the nutritional information to the contrary.
4. I need to talk to my mother at least once a day.
5. I'm a writer, and that's it. I'm not meant to work for the Man, or work in the service of others.
6. I'm at my best when I am as far removed from the general public as possible.
7. I like Bon Jovi, and that will never change.
8. I enjoy low forms of culture (VH1, The Golden Girls, cop shows) but if you want to talk about postmodern literature, sit down, bitch, I got something to say (i.e. I can do that too).
9. I tend to fall down steps.
10. I like to lay in bed and smile at whomever is laying there beside of me.
11. I like cotton underwear, even if I am going to get lucky that day. It's just more comfortable.
Things I Need to Improve About Myself
1. I guess I should pay the bills on time.
2. I need to start folding my laundry instead of just leaving it in a Leaning Tower of Pisa-esque structure in my room.
3. I need to stop taking my boyfriend for granted.
4. I need to write more.
5. I need to slow down and chill out and enjoy things rather than rush from here to there in some sort of attempt to be able to buy clothes and lipstick.
(Of course you knew this list would be shorter than the others. I am a Southern Literary Queen after all.)
And finally...Things that Piss Me Off
1. The word "muggy."
2. Bad writing that is supposed to be good writing. I mean bad writing for bad writing's sake is great, but when it is supposed to be an attempt at literature, come on!
3. Those "W" stickers that everyone has on the back of their SUV's that are printed with the American flag. How frigging retarded are you people?
4. Oprah, Dr. Phil, and other self-help aficionados.
5. William and Mary Parking Services.
6. The head D.A. on Law and Order. He gives the South a bad name.
7. People dissing John Kerry's military record. I mean, come on, the guy looks like Lurch, and WHEN he gets elected, he is going to inherit a whole heap of bad shit. He's got enough problems.
8. Consumerist mentality.
9. Pretentious people (although I know sometimes that I am pseudo-pretentious--It's like those homophobes who are secretly gay. Jerry Falwell for example--oh shit, I just compared myself to Jerry Falwell. Shoot me now.)
10. The fact that weekends are only two days, and that there are no compulsory "reading days" in the "real world."
posted by Southern Belle at 11:43 AM
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